spontaneous

so the other night i randomly decided to write a story and I ended up starting out with the night my daddy died. but then it got into a whole other business that i would just like to share with you.. if you would take the time to read it i would much appreciate it and hopefully so will you, Ben. :) <3

Ben and I started taking interest in each other in year nine, when the science classes got moved around and we got put in the same class. He always stood out with his strawberry blonde hair and his hilarious sense of humour. He was so popular and so clever, and knew the answer to most questions. He was one of those people who rarely put their hand up and tended to shout out instead but no one minded because he asked good questions and gave the right answers. He was funny and said funny things and he was really nice and friendly.
   One lesson, our teacher put us into groups for an experiment with the light boxes, and Ben and I were put in the same group. He made me laugh so much and I enjoyed being around him. He made me happy even back then, and, to be honest, I had always had my eye on him since my friend told me she fancied him in year eight. I knew his name but he didn’t know mine - he had gone to primary school with my other friend who always pointed him out when he walked past. When I saw that he had been put in the same science class as me, I would sometimes walk in a pluck up enough courage to say hello. I had to pluck up courage because he was so popular and totally out of my league. He had so many friends who wanted to talk to him all the time and I would think, ‘Why would someone as loved as him want to talk to a nobody like me?’
   His lockers were opposite mine and he started to say hi to me in between in each lesson when we saw each other. I would smile politely back at him trying not to look too interested because he was so out of my league that if we couldn’t be together, we should just be good friends. But then saying ‘hi’ turned into hugs and he started saving a seat for me next to him in our English lessons that we had shared since the beginning of year nine.
   We watched Romeo and Juliet (the version with Leonardo Dicaprio in it) as part of studying Shakespeare and I was sitting next to him. Our table was an L shape, and Ben and his friend were sat on one side and my friend and I on the other. Ben and I were sat on the corner and he nudged his foot against mine. Then he moved his arm towards mine and put his hand in mine.
   There was another time when we went into the Weston Theatre to watch the year eights do an election thing as part of their citizenship classes. He saved me a seat next to him and then, when it had ended and we were slowly emptying the theatre, he held my hand and held it firmly like he didn’t want to let go. When we got to the lockers he waited for me to gather my things and then leaned in to kiss me before he left. Silly ol’ me turned away at the last minute because I panicked and now I regret it because I did want him to kiss me.
   That was the only time in my life that I have felt so wanted. There has never been a point in my life that I can remember in which I have felt even close to an equivalence of that moment.
   That summer I went on holiday to the Philippines since we have family there and we stayed there for six weeks. I missed him and when I got back he told me he had missed me. While I was there I had had a lot of time to sit on the beach and watch the sunset and reflect on what I really wanted. And I did want this - I did want to be with Ben.
   When I got back I went to his house, still just friends, to watch him play Final Fantasy VII (because that had been my excuse to see him outside of school and go to his house and spend time with him). In the end, I watched him play a bit of Portal and then we watched Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children. His room is tiny and we had to sit on the bed to watch the TV. I put my head on his shoulder and he kissed me a few times on the cheek. I had a good time and definitely wanted to have more of those moments.
   From the Tuesday after that weekend, we became official. We told everyone that we were together and when people asked us, ‘Who asked who out?’ We would said, ‘Neither of us. It just happened.’ This made me feel so grown up because it was mature and it was genuine - we both fell for each other and we both decided, without having to discuss or ask questions, that we wanted to be with each other.
   And from there it was plain sailing. We would see each other nearly every weekend and we would talk on MSN after school and he would tell me how much he wanted to be with me at that moment and when I said goodnight he’d say, ‘I will do whatever it takes to talk to you tomorrow because you are the most important thing to me.’ And I believed it and he did - he would wait for me after lessons and hold my hand walking to and from our lockers.




that was as far as I got but there is other stuff on my computer that I would also like to share!